


Little Bear

by LearningToBreathex



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Break Up, Breaking Up & Making Up, Cheating, F/M, Makeup, Pregnancy, Romance, Teen Angst, Teen Pregnancy, Teen Romance, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-17
Updated: 2014-08-06
Packaged: 2018-02-05 01:39:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 18,799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1800748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LearningToBreathex/pseuds/LearningToBreathex
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One month ago Makayla had everything. She got on well with her parents, had good relationship with her twin brother and was popular with amazing friends and a loving boyfriend.</p><p>Now a month later, she wishes she could turn back the clock.</p><p>Now she is faced with a life where her loving boyfriend is now her cheating ex. Where she not only has to put up with the school bitch but also her friends who have abandoned her in her time of need. Where her parents are furious with her and her brother can't even stand to be in the same room as her.</p><p>The worst part is, Makayla believes she deserved it.</p><p>Why? Because at the age of 17, Makayla has gone and gotten herself pregnant.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

How? It wasn't possible? Was it?

I suppose it must be, otherwise I wouldn't be in this mess would I?

Oh my god, my mother was going to kill me. I don't think my dad's reaction is going to be much better to be fair. Yes, in fact, I can already imagine him running out the house, golf club in hand, ready to beat the living shit out of Harry.

Harry.

Well, there's an issue in itself. How do you go about telling your ex-boyfriend something like this?  
Especially a boyfriend who you've only broke up with a week ago and that you may or may not have referred to as an arsehole, who is over compensating for the fact that a certain piece of his anatomy - and I’m not talking about his feet – is on the small side. Not to mention, said incident happened in front of the entire school.  
So, yea, don't think the whole "We can still be friends" applies here.

 

"Kayla, are you planning on coming out of there anytime soon? Some of us really need to pee and I don't think mum would appreciate me using the sink"

I jumped at the sound of my brothers voice, rising out of the panicked thoughts racing around inside my head.

"Yea, just give me one second." I quickly washed my hands and tried to hide the test as best I could from prying eyes as I left the bathroom. I rushed past Liam, trying to avoid eye contact, making my way upstairs without giving anything away.

I put the test in my pencil case and stuffed it into my bag. I would chuck it in the bin at school, not wanting to risk anyone at home finding it. I wasn't ready for them to know yet.

The rest of the morning past normally and if anything about my behaviour seemed different, no-one seemed to notice. Or at least comment on it. I was pretty certain Liam had realised something was wrong, but then again we are twins, what do you expect.

He probably thinks it because of the break up that I'm acting off. It must be weird for him: Harry's his best friend and it can't be easy being stuck in the middle. I was worried about their friendship when we broke up and I know they argued. I wonder how long their friendship will last when Liam finds out.

* * * *

I walked into school with Liam - having been dropped at school by our mother - and we made our way over to his group of friends. I stayed to chat for a while, until Harry showed up at which point it quickly got awkward. So I made the decision to walk away, instead of starting another argument as I'm sure would have happened if I had stuck around any longer. I didn't want to put Liam in that position.

I walked over to my friends: Perrie, Danielle and Eleanor. They were quite simply insane and I don't know how I could possibly survive this place without them. They had been there for me constantly over the last week: offering me support and advice, not to mention calling Harry every name under the sun. They sure know how to cheer me up.

"Hey Kay! How's my favourite girl doing this fine day?" Danielle asked, receiving  
scoffs off the other two.

"Yea ok. Would be better if I didn't have to see his slimy face every day."

"Aww I know babes. But it's the weekend tomorrow so you can have two slime free days."

"Right well, I think I'll just pop to the loo before the bell, so I'll see you in class El and I'll see you two losers at break."

"Hey Danielle, wait there and I'll come with you." I called after her. I still had to get rid of the test and this would be my best chance. Would just need to make sure Danielle didn't see it and that was easily done.

As we walked into the girls toilets I instantly recognised the voice coming from the far corner of the room. Taylor: a girl I was friends with in primary but who for some reason seems to hate me now. She had her back to the door and it soon became clear that neither she nor her friends were aware that I or Danielle had entered the toilets.

"... and he asked me to come over tonight?"

"Really? Isn't it a bit soon? He did only split up with Kayla last week."

My name caught my attention and I paid closer attention to the conversation taking place.

"So? Who cares? It won't be the first time. We've been hooking up pretty much every weekend for the last month and a half. That bitch deserves ..."

What I deserved exactly, I don't quite know as I had ran out the toilet before I had a chance to find out, slamming the door on that cow and wishing I could rewind the last five minutes of my life. Why did I have to hear that conversation?

I walked to my first period class, not caring that the bell hadn't even rung yet. I sunk to the floor, sitting at the door, willing myself not to cry, he wasn't worth my tears. I couldn't help it though and I reached up to wipe the tears as quickly as they appeared. It was only as I felt arms wrap around me that I realised that Danielle, Perrie and El had followed me. I smiled softly and let them pull me up as the bell rang out.

I muttered to them that I would be ok and I would speak to them at break, before watching them walk away, making their way to their own classes. Liam walked along the corridor with Harry, and I found myself having to blink back tears. I refused to let one single tear slip down my face while in his presence. I still had my pride.

I walked into class, taking my seat as Liam walked through the door. Fortunately Harry wasn't in my class this period, unfortunately Liam was and he noticed something was wrong the second he sat down.

"What's up?" he muttered, as our English teacher started taking attendance.

"Nothing." I replied.

"I'm not thick. I can tell something’s wrong, just tell me."

"It doesn't matter, I'll tell you later."

As attendance finished and the class started, Liam was forced to accept that he wasn't going to get anything out of me and turned to listen to the lesson being taught at the front of the class. My mind wandered off though, thinking about Harry and asking myself, why would he cheat? I wasn't listening to anything being said and I didn't even break out of my trance when everyone started moving: taking out pens and paper.

"Kayla, can I borrow a pen?" I barely register Liam's question, only half-listening and not really thinking at all. So I nod and mutter: "In my bag."

I don’t realise, not until it's too late. I had forgotten about the test. I remember of course but I remember only as Liam opens my pencil case and spots it, sitting there face up. He of course reads that one plain and simple word that will change my life forever:

"Pregnant."  
…  
Liam seemed to freeze as slowly a frown made its way onto his face. He looked at me slowly as his face quickly changed from a look of realisation to one of rage. He didn't say anything to me, instead jumping up and racing out of the classroom: ignoring our teachers’ protests.

"LIAM WAIT!' I yelled, as I too ran out of the classroom, making my way into the one next door, just in time to see Liam punch Harry across the face: knocking him off his chair and onto the floor.

"What is going on?" Harry's teacher yelled, outraged as Liam went to punch Harry again. I ran to stop him but Danielle bet me to it.

"Liam stop. I know Harry cheated but punching him isn't going to solve anything." She blurted out. Great.

"HE WHAT?" Liam roared, once again lunging at Harry. Two of the boys grabbed hold of him and forced him out of the class at the teacher’s insistence.

"Head teacher, now!" The teacher glowered at Liam, before turning to Harry. "I think you should go see the nurse."

I went to walk after Liam.

"I don't think so Kayla, back to class."

"Please Sir, I have to go with him. I can calm him down. Please, it's my fault he done this. He's trying to look out for me, to protect me."

The teacher stood silent for a minute, thinking before finally nodding his head in defeat. "Fine, on you go."

I ran after Liam and Harry, thankful that there was enough distance between them that I should be able to talk to Liam without Harry hearing.

"Liam, you have to say you found out that Harry cheated on me with Taylor. That, that's why you attacked him. Please? I'm not ready for him to know."

Liam just turned and looked at me in disgust before skulking into the head teacher’s office, I made to walk in after him but was told to get back to class. I guess it was up to Liam now and judging by the look on his face, the whole school would know by break.

I headed back to class, shoving my pencil case - which was still lying open on my desk, thank god no-one looked inside - into my bag and proceeding to sit and stare into space for the remainder of the period. My arms crossed, worry clearly etched across my features.

Break time found my running along to the admin block, eager to find Liam.

"What's happening?" I asked, as soon as I saw him with his arms crossed, sat in front of the main office building.

"Suspended: for a week. Mums on her way" He kept his face down, staring at the floor. He couldn't even look at me.

"Li, I'm sorry. You shouldn't have had to have found out this way. I forgot the test was in my bag."

"I shouldn't have had to have found out at all" he fumed, his head snapping up to look at me. "Because you shouldn't be pregnant!"

"Keep your voice down will you." I hissed at him, turning to look round the room: making sure we hadn't been over heard. "Look I know I shouldn't be but I am and there's nothing we can do about it now."

"You should be in class."

"I don't care... Liam, what did you tell them? Was Harry there when you spoke to the head?"

"Yea, he was there." Liam looked to the ground again as he spoke, playing with a thread on his trousers, before looking back at me once more. "I told them what you asked me to. That I found out about him cheating on you but apparently that's not a good enough reason to hit someone, so I'm suspended."

I hugged him to me, feeling extremely guilty and to blame for what happened. At that point my mum walked through the school doors, just as the school bell rang, signalling the end of break. She stormed her way over to us, looking more angry than I would have thought possible and certainly more angry than I had ever seen her before. Her mouth opened as if to start yelling, the instant she was stood over us. I butted in before she could say anything.

"Please, don't yell at him mum? This is my fault."

"Your fault? What, did you grab his hand and force him to punch that boy?"

"No but..."

"But Nothing! As far as I've been told Liam barged into a class and punched a boy in your year. Completely out of the blue. That it was entirely unprovoked."

"Mum, it was Harry" I stated, quietly.

"Oh" was her simple response. She knew something had to have happened for Liam to hit Harry. "What happened?"

"Liam found out that Harry was cheating on me" I replied, not able to look anywhere but the ground. I felt Liam tense beside me, but what did he expect? I could hardly tell her the truth here.

"Right" she said curtly. She looked angry but I'm not so sure it was entirely directed at Liam this time. "I'll just go speak to whoever I need to speak to and then we can head home, ok?" Liam nodded. "You best get to class Kayla, can't have you both missing lessons now can we?"

I nodded before walking away, as Harry walked out the nurse's office, heading the same way I was going.

"I'm sorry." he muttered, falling into step beside me. I ignored him "I tried to get them not to suspend Liam but they said they had to. That it was the school's procedure and they couldn't be seen to be letting someone off."

I scoffed. "Right, you're sorry you got my brother suspended, but not for anything else? Not for cheating on me?"

He swallowed hard. "No, that's not it. I was just trying to do the right thing. Make things better, make up for everything I did wrong."

I shook my head. "You're unbelievable. You think I could ever forgive you for this just because you tried to stop my brother from being suspended for punching you. A punch you deserves by the way. Do me a favour? Stay the hell away from me... and my brother."

With that I turned and walked through the double doors, heading to class and sitting near the back, content with the idea of doing nothing, the same way I had in the class previous.

I placed a hand on my stomach - which was still completely flat - and thought of all the trouble I had already caused and Liam was the only one who knew.

I knew I had to at least tell my parents soon. I couldn't ask Liam to keep it a secret from them for too long. It wasn't fair.

Still, the thought of telling them was making me feel sick.

* * * *  
I dumped my bag on the floor in my room before changing out of my school stuff and into sweats and t-shirt. I turned to face the mirror and pulled my top up, looking at my stomach, trying to spot a sign, anything, that gave away that there was a human being growing inside me.

"Don't worry, you aren't showing ...yet" I jumped at the sound of Liam's voice, turning quickly and dropping my t-shirt.

"Well, that's a relief" I mutter, my voice catching in my throat. I coughed trying to clear it as the tension in the room rose.

"I wouldn't get so relaxed, people are going to notice eventually" Liam replied, although not in a mean way. More trying to remind me, this wasn't a problem that was just going to go away. "Well, not unless..."

"No!" I cut him off, my arm coming up to lie across my stomach subconsciously. I had only just found out, but I already knew that an abortion was not an option for me. This was my fault and the baby ... my baby ... shouldn't have to pay for it. "I can't. I know it might be the easiest way Liam, but I can't"

He just nods. Noticing the tears forming in my eyes, he made his way over to me pulling me into a hug and instantly I let go as I buried my face in his chest. I cried for the end of my relationship, I cried over the fact that the boy I thought loved me had been cheating on me long before we broke up and I cried because I was pregnant and didn't have a clue what I was going to do. I felt Liam shift and soon my feet rose from the ground as I was carried over to the bed. He placed me on the bed before lying beside me and allowing me to rest my head on his chest. We just lay there for what felt like hours as Liam stroked my hair and I felt the tears subside as calmness engulfed me.

In that moment I felt so little and small. Liam was only ten minutes older than me but right now it felt like ten years. It was as if he could protect me from everything and stop anything bad from happening.

"What am I going to do Liam?" I asked, my voice small, not sure I wanted to hear the answer.

"I ...I don't know" was his simple response. I felt the tears slowly fall down my face again in that second before I was plunged into darkness as the emotions of the day took their toll and I fell asleep.

* * * * 

The next day was Saturday and I spent most of the day lounging about until Danielle phoned.

"Hey, how are you?" I asked.

"Yea ok. Listen, Josh is having a leaving party for him and Niall tonight before they head over to the States for that exchange trip thing. We've all been invited, so hurry up and get ready. I'll pick you up at 7, ok?"

"I don't know Dan; I'm not really feeling that well, think I might just give it a miss and stay home."

"No, no, no, no, no!" she insisted, "You're not getting out of this one that easily. Everyone is going to be there and that includes you. Oh and ask Liam if he needs a ride. I have room for him too seen as El and Perrie are going to meet us there."

"Fine" I replied, realising that I didn't have much choice in the matter. There was no point arguing, Danielle was stubborn and I knew there was no chance of her giving in. "I'll see you at 7".

With that I hung up the phone and was off for a shower and to get ready. I thought I may as well dress to impress seen as this was probably the last party I would go to before I was the size of a whale. I wanted to look nice. Plus the bitch in me wanted to show Harry what he was missing.

I wore my dark brown hair down and wavy making sure that I blow dried it with extra volume, before applying my make up with dark eyes and red lips. I slipped into my black playsuit which I had worn only once before. Liam was the only person at the party who would have seen me in it before and I doubt he would notice.

A car horn beeped outside my house and I grabbed my bag before walking downstairs. I met Liam at the front door and we headed out and into Danielle's car together.

The party was already in full swing when we arrived: people dancing or else getting drinks at the bar or just sitting chatting. Liam headed over to sit with his mates - I spotted Harry sitting in amongst them, he seemed to notice me too, his eyes roamed over me as I saw him swallow visibly. Danielle and I soon spotted the rest of the girls and headed over to the table.

"Hey girlies," Eleanor said, enthusiastically "Well aren't you two looking gorgeous this evening."

"Thanks El" I replied, chuckling lightly at her antics. "You're looking rather fabulous yourself, I must say."

"Why thank you darling" she put on her best 'posh' voice "although I must say that you, Kayla, in particular are looking incredibly sexy indeed. Is this for a certain ex-boyfriend's benefit?"

"Meh, where's the fun in being single and hot if I can't rub it in his face?" I grinned. I had to admit I was glad Danielle had made me come tonight, it looked as though it was going to be a fun night. "Care to dance?"

Eleanor, Danielle and I all headed onto the dance floor as Perrie decided to head to the bar. Ten minutes and three songs later, Perrie was back at the table and waving us over. My heart sank as soon as I reached the table.

"What are these?" I quizzed, none of us where 18 yet. In reply she held up a driver’s license - she can't drive yet - and on closer inspection I realised it was her sister Jade's. I shook my head.

"I'm not drinking." I bit my lip.

"Oh, come on, don't be such a spoil sport, you've never had a problem with drinking before now."

Yes, well I've never been pregnant before now.

"I know, but I haven't been feeling that great and besides the last thing I need is to get drunk and say something to a certain jackass that I know I'll regret."

The girls nodded at this in understanding. I headed to the bar and got myself a soft drink. I went back to the table and we all sat together: laughing and joking as if everything was normal. Of course to them, everything was normal.

About an hour into the party, the DJ announced that the buffet was open and we all headed over for food. I was standing talking to Perrie while piling some prawn cocktail onto my plate when the smell hit me and I felt a sudden churning in my stomach. I hurried to put the plate down on the first clear surface before bolting out the room as quickly as possible without causing a scene. Once in the lobby I ran as fast as I could towards the toilets as I felt someone running behind me. I made it just in time to throw up what felt like the entire contents of my stomach.

"Kayla, are you alright?" I heard Perrie’s voice carry through the toilet door.

"Yea, just give me a minute" and I wasn't lying, despite being sick I felt just fine.

I opened the door and headed over to the sink, trying to rinse my mouth out and reapply make-up, making sure there was no evidence left of what happened.

"Are you sure you're ok?" Perrie rubbed my arm, concerned.

"Yea I feel fine now," I replied, using my best 'puzzled' face. "I don't know why that just happened. I smelt the food and suddenly felt incredibly nauseous, yet now I feel absolutely fine. Strange, huh?"

"Yea strange," Perrie didn't sound entirely convinced "I don't know Kay, you better watch: refusing to drink and then feeling sick at the smell of food. You sure you're not pregnant?"

"No, what? Of course I'm not!" I realised a minute too late that Perrie was joking and my altogether over the top denial had the opposite effect and had in fact confirmed that I was indeed pregnant.

"OH MY GOD KAYLA! YOU'RE PREG..." I threw my hand over her mouth.

"Will you keep your voice down?" my eyes just about popped out my head. "Do you promise not to yell or scream?" Perrie nodded and I dropped my hand from her mouth. "Yes, I'm pregnant. I only found out yesterday and Liam is the only other person who knows. He found out in English yesterday and that's why he punched Harry."

Perrie was staring at me open mouthed.

"Can you please say something? Your sort of freaking me out just standing there staring at me."

"You're pregnant?"

I nodded.

"R..right." she nodded, although didn't seem to be taking any of it in. "Wait, what? How?"

"I think you know how."

"I know but it's just, weren't you careful?" she hit me upside the head.

"Thanks for that" I replied, sarcastically. "And yea we were. I guess I was just one of the unlucky ones whose pill decides not to work."

That's when I remembered.

"Wait, I was ill remember? I had that two day bug thing." I looked at Perrie, who nodded. "I had taken my pill but was sick not long after on both days meaning it would have been ineffective. I saw Harry the weekend after. God, how could I have been so stupid?"

Perrie didn't have an answer for me as I sniffed hard and tried not to cry for what felt like the 100th time in the space of two days. I pulled myself together.  
"Perrie, you can't tell anyone, okay?" I pleaded with her.

She nodded once again. "Of course not, it's your business, it's up to you to tell people, when you're ready."

"Thank you" I smiled softly to her, before taking one last look in the mirror and heading back out into the party.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I woke up late Sunday morning to the usual sounds of my parents making breakfast and discussing their plans for the day. I slowly eased my way out of bed, put my slippers on and headed down towards the kitchen. My dad was reading the paper while sat at the breakfast bar and my mum was stood at the stove as I walked in.

"Morning Dad" I smiled, walking over and dropping a kiss on his cheek.

"Morning Mum," I hugged her. "What you making?"

"Oh, the usual fry up for your Dad" she signed, frowning over her shoulder at him as though scolding him for his eating habits, we all knew she was kidding. "Want some?"

At that moment though I began to smell the food sizzling in the pan and in that split second the overwhelming feeling from the night previous returned. I ran past Liam out the kitchen door and into the toilet just in time to hurl my guts up for the second time in twelve hours, how did I even have food left in my system?

I quickly cleaned up and made to head back up to my room to lie down. That plan was ruined quickly as I heard my mother shout my name from the kitchen.

"Are you ok honey?" My mother asked, concern etched across her face. "You look awfully white."

"Yea, I'm ok, was just a bit sick is all." I tried to smile, not really managing. I noticed Liam was determinedly not looking in my direction as he tucked into his own fry-up. "I think I'll just skip breakfast and head back to bed for a while, if that's ok?"

"Sure it is Kay," my Dad replied "I just hope it's not a hangover you've got" he frowned at me.

"No dad, I didn't drink anything last night, so definitely not a hangover."

"Good, it was silly of me to think so. You're a good girl Kayla. I should have realised you were way too sensible for any of that." He looked pointedly at Liam. "At least I can rely on one of you not to do anything silly."

Oh crap.

"Uh huh. Well anyway I'm just going to head back to bed."

* * * * *

Two hours and plenty of tossing and turning later, there was a knock on the door.

"Come in," I replied, thinking it would be mum checking up on me. I was therefore surprised when Liam walked through the door.

"How are you?" he asked, although he didn't seem all that worried about me.

"Yea ok" I replied, softly.

"I brought you a sandwich seen as you didn't have any breakfast."

"It’s okay, I'm not hungry."

"Yea, well it's not all about you anymore, is it?" he snapped.

I frowned up at him, I understood that this must be hard on him and that he had every right to be annoyed at me, but right now I really couldn't be dealing with his mood.

"Yea sorry, about that I seemed to have forgotten I was pregnant for a second there but thanks for reminding me." I snarled back, my tone dripping with sarcasm.

"Oh get off it Kayla, I'm trying to be supportive here and help you out when really all I want to do is yell at you."

"Will you keep your voice down?" I urged.

"Oh, don't worry mum and dad are out. Told me to keep an eye on you, seen as I'm not going anywhere. I got suspended didn't I? So I don't need to go to training, do I? That along with a weeklong suspension from school has really got me on mum and dads good books." - it was his turn to use sarcasm now - "If only they knew the real reason I bet that son of a bitch up, I wouldn't look so bad then would I? If mum and dad found out that Little Miss Sensible had gone and gotten herself pregnant, they wouldn't have room to be angry at me at all. After all who can blame me for losing my temper when I had just found out that my sister is the school bike?"

I slapped him. Hard. Leaving a large red handprint etched across his face. I knew he was annoyed. I knew the supportive caring brother act couldn't last forever. That he was bound to lose it with me eventually. I didn't expect this though. For his words to be so cruel and cutting. He didn't sound like a brother yelling at me because he was worried or disappointed. He sounded bitter and angry just because he was being punished and I wasn't. That it was my fault. I am to blame, I know that, but for him to say the things that he did, I was beyond furious.

We both stood staring at each other the tension thick in the air. Neither of us moved, both frozen in place. Next thing I knew I had launched myself at him, punching and hitting every part of his body I could get my hands to, yelling incoherent sentences at him as I let the rage pour out of me. I only stopped when I felt hands go round my waist, lifting me off Liam's now cowering body on the floor. I continued to struggle, trying to get free until I heard my dad whisper softly in my ear as he stroked my hair.

"It's ok baby girl, it's ok."

That's when I broke. I stopped fighting, letting myself go weak and clutched onto my dad's arm for support as the sobs wracked through my body.

Nothing was ok. Nothing would ever be ok again.

* * * * *

Liam and I sat on opposite sides of the couch, both of us glowering at the floor, neither of us acknowledging the others existence.

"Would either of you like to enlighten us to what's going on?" my mum asked, her eyebrows almost hitting her hair line.

"Ask her" Liam spat, whipping his head in my direction.

I continued staring at the ground as my mother asked "Kayla, what happened?"

"My brothers a dick that's what happened" I retorted my gaze unmoving, my voice sounding harsh. Liam scoffed.

"Kayla, I don't know what's gotten into you, but you do not speak of your brother like that."

I rolled my eyes as my dad began speaking. "We'll ask again, what's going on? You two argue, but never like that. Something must have happened."

I felt a tear roll down my cheek lightly.

"Why don't you just tell them Kayla? Tell them why I actually hit Harry? Why don't you?"

I turned to look at him for the first time since attacking him in my room. How could he? I wasn't ready. Now they'll want to know. I'll have to tell them. Why was he being so mean about this all of a sudden, what's changed?

"What do you mean Liam? You said you hit Harry because he cheated on Kayla?" my mum sounded confused. Both her and my dad where frowning at me, concerned clearly. Liam just stared at me pointedly.

"I...I..." I started, taking a deep breath. "The thing is ..."

I looked up at my mum and dad, both of them looking at me intently, worried about me. I felt tears roll down my cheeks and couldn’t do anything to stop them as I thought about how much I've disappointed them.

"I can't do this." I muttered, leaving the room and running upstairs to the room, burying myself under the covers.

Downstairs my mum made to follow me, but my dad grabbed her arm, stopping her.

"Leave it, she's upset, give her some space to calm down." he stated, before turning to face Liam. "What did you do?"

"Oh yea, it's my fault isn't it?" Liam yelled, shaking his head in defiance "You walk in on her repeatedly punching me but no it's my fault. Always is, because perfect Kayla can't do anything wrong, can she? I can't tell you what's wrong, that’s for Kayla to say. One thing I will say though, you're in for a shock."  
With that Liam stormed from the room, slamming the door behind him.

I jumped from the sound as I heard it from my room, before rolling over: falling into a restless sleep, not filled with nightmares, but with reality.

Right now though, there wasn't much difference.

* * * * *

I opened my eyes only an hour later: feeling no better than I had before sleeping. This was turning out to be the day from hell. I chewed my lip tensely, coming to a decision, grabbing my school bag and hurrying towards the stairs before I could back out. I walked out of my room as Liam left the bathroom, our eyes meeting before he looked down at the ground. He looked as though he felt guilty for his actions over the last day. Good, he deserved to.

I walked past him, defiance and anger evident on my face as I made a show of ignoring him. I know he noticed my school bag, I wonder if he realised what I was about to do. He just walked past and into his room. Obviously he was going to be of no support whether he realised what I was doing or not.

I opened the living room door softly, watching for a second at my mum and dad laughing at the T.V, before entering the room and stealing myself for the moment, building up the courage to face them. I had to do this now.

"Mum? Dad? Can we talk?" I asked, uncertainty lacing itself in my voice.

"Of course darling, what's wrong?" My mum asked, already going into mother hen mode, God, this is going to be hard.

"See...well...me and... Harry" I started playing with a thread on the couch as I sat down, unable to look my parents in the eye as my dad shut off the T.V. "We were...you know...but we were careful, I promise we were careful."

I glanced up quickly to see their faces; my dad looked annoyed, my mum just worried.

"I'm on the pill - or at least I was, I suppose I should probably stop now, it might be harmful-" I stopped, taking a breath, my eyes returning to look at the couch. I realised I wasn't making much sense. "But I got sick that time, remember? And I guess it meant the pill didn't work and I saw Harry that weekend and well" I pulled my pencil case out of my bag, unzipping it. "We were in English when Liam asked me for a pen. I had just found out about Harry and Taylor, all other thoughts went out of my head. I forgot I had hid it in there, I didn't want any of you to find it, so I was going to chuck it in the bin when I got to school, but when I went to the toilets to do so I overheard Taylor and left before I had the chance. So anyway, I told Liam to take a pen from my pencil case. That's when he seen it.

"Seen what?" My mum sounded as if she already knew the answer but was asking me anyway, hoping she was wrong. I looked at my parents, both of them looked worried and for the first time ever, that I had seen, they looked scared. I took a deep breath and pulled out the test from my pencil case.

"This" I whispered, placing it in my mum’s hand before uttering the three words I never thought I would say at the age of 17.

"I'm pregnant Mum"

All I could hear was the clock ticking past slowly and oddly loud as I sat there, watching my parents. I chewed my lip nervously as I held my breath and waited for a response. It was strange that the clock was ticking so overbearingly loud, as if reminding me that time was indeed still passing because within the room it felt as though everything had froze. Nobody was moving and although in reality only a few seconds had gone by in my head it felt much longer.

Finally the silence ended, I knew it had to, and it didn't take long for me to wish I could get it back. Because even though it was eerie and tense it was much better than the alternative which I now had to endure.

"You're, you're pregnant?" My mum asked, disbelief pouring out of her.

I just nodded slowly, still biting my lip, looking downward and playing with the thread from before.

"But, how?" She sounded confused. It was as though she wasn't going to let herself believe it, despite the fact that the proof was sitting right there in front of her.

I looked up at her at that question, having to stop myself from rolling my eyes. "I think we both know the answer to that question." I whispered, unable to talk any louder.

"But... it's... you" words appeared to be failing my mother as she looked from me to the test and back again.

"I'm sor-" I began, before being interrupted. However, this time it wasn't my mother who spoke.

"DON'T" my father roared at me. I looked to him, taken aback by the sheer rage emitting from him. "Don't you DARE apologise. As if this is a forgotten piece of homework, or a detention or a miss curfew. As if this is something a quick sorry can fix, because it's not. Do you hear me?"

I nodded, tears beginning to pool in the corners of my eyes.

"You've managed to ruin your entire life" he continued. "And for what, a quick bit of fun, with some boy who clearly doesn't even care about you, given what you've recently found out about him. I thought we raised you better than this. Your mother and I didn't raise you up to become some tart who doesn't know how to use the word no."

I recoiled as if he had slapped me. I would have preferred it if he had, anything would have been better than hearing the words pouring out of his mouth. I stood up, bolting for the door, wanting to get away from this entire situation.

"Don't you walk away from me!" he growled at me. I stopped at the door, closing it back over and returning to my position on the couch. It made me think, I couldn't run, or hide, no matter how much I tried. This wasn't a situation I could get out of.

"Did he force you?" My mum asked, her voice small. “Or threaten you? Say he would dump you if you said no?"

I shook my head. "I wanted it. I felt ready and I still think that I was. I don't regret sleeping with Harry. I loved him, part of me still does. I just wish it didn't end up with this outcome. Especially now we've split up."

"How long?" my mum asked. I looked up at her, confused. "How long had you two been sleeping together?" she elaborated.

I shrugged. "A few months. Does it really matter?"

"I suppose it doesn't really change much."

"What happens now?"

"I think you should go to bed. It's getting late and I think your dad and I need to have a chat."

I nodded before turning and walking out the door.

I made it to my bedroom before lunging myself on to the bed. I curled into a ball and thought everything over in my head.

My dad's reaction upset me, although I couldn't have expected anything else. He was angry and extremely disappointed. I just hoped that in time he would come around. My mum’s reaction however confused me, I thought she would have reacted much the same as my dad had, but she seemed more understanding or at least like she was trying to. She was at least trying to be helpful, supportive. I felt at ease a bit more now, as though there was a weight lifted from me but I was also dreading something. I don't know what, it was as if I could sense something was going to happen and that it wasn't going to be good.

I placed my arm over my stomach as if protect the growing child inside and let myself succumb to the sleep that was over taking my body.

* * * *

I woke up Monday morning to find myself tangled within my bed sheets, clearly I had had a restless sleep full of tossing and turning. I lay there for at least five minutes, trying to work up the courage to move, to just step out of bed and try to get ready. 

Eventually I managed it, getting ready quickly and quietly. I managed to avoid any member of my family as I made my way to the bathroom, although wasn’t so lucky on the way back to my room. Liam walked out of his room just as I exited the bathroom. He opened his mouth to speak but I just shook my head at him, walking past him with barely a glance. Why he was up anyway, I don’t know. Today was the first day of his suspension.

Once ready, I made my way into the kitchen. I had intended to grab a slice off toast and just eat it as I walked to school. I really didn’t want to have to face my parents today. It seemed my mother had different plans though, as I walked in to kitchen to find a full fry up waiting for me.

“Eat up Kayla, you’ll need to keep your strength up.” My mum spoke, her voice light and cheery and a smile on her face – a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes.  
“Mum, I’m not really hungry” I mumbled, barely being able to look at her.

“I know honey, you still feeling a bit icky?” my mum sounded sympathetic. It confused me, why was she acting so ok with it all? Surely she must be angry with me? In any case I wasn’t about to question her about it, happy just to have one person in this house who still seemed to be on my side. I nodded slowly to her. I did still feel sick, although whether it was due to morning sickness or just the drama of the previous night, I wasn’t sure.

“My poor baby” my mum continued, “I know its hard honey, but you need to keep your strength up, it’s important for the baby.” 

There it was my mum mollycoddling me, only she could call me her baby the day after finding out I’m having a baby of my own. I had to stop myself from rolling my eyes, like really mum? 

But I wasn’t going to annoy her when she was being so good about all this, at least so far. I wasn’t putting it past her to blow up at some point. Maybe it just hasn’t hit her yet, she hasn’t come to terms with the fact that I’m having a baby. I can only hope that when she does, I’m nowhere nearby.

“I guess so mum. It’s just difficult to try and eat, when even the thought of food is enough to make me heave.”

“I know, but listen, I phoned your doctor this morning, said it was urgent so you have an appointment to see her first thing today. You really need to get checked over, get everything confirmed and we can see if she can give you anything for the sickness.”

I nodded. I hadn’t even thought of going to the doctor. I felt extremely stupid all of a sudden, obviously I needed to see the doctor. Get everything checked out, as far as we know, it could be a false alarm. The test could be a false positive, I doubted it, but still it was important to see the doctor, to find out how far along I am. 

“Hey, don’t worry,” my mum rubbed my back in reassurance. My face must have gave away how I was feeling. “You’re new to all this and I’ll be right there with you at the doctors.”  
I smiled at my mum before turning to eat my breakfast as Liam walked into the room. I made sure to avoid eye contact with him, as he sat down at the table, not quite trusting myself not to stab him with my fork. I was still beyond angry at him.

“What are you doing up?” I mumbled to him, staring at my plate. My voice snapped at him, making him aware that I wasn’t about to forgive him anytime soon.

“Dad’s taking me into work with him this week. Said just because I was suspended I wasn’t going to get to lie about and do nothing all week.”

I nodded in understanding, before getting up and placing my plate in the sink as my mum mentioned that we’d better leave for my appointment. I quickly brushed my teeth and grabbed my coat.

 

* * * *

Fifteen minutes later and I was sat patiently waiting outside the doctor’s office, anxious at the thought of having to let yet another person know that I was going to be a mum soon. 

As I sat there I thought of everything that had happened in the last few months and how everything had changed. Also about how much more was going to change in the coming months. 

I would have to tell Harry soon, I realised that. As much as he had hurt me, this is his child too. He deserved to know. 

I thought back to 6 months ago, when his aunt had come to visit from London. She had a baby girl, only 4 months old. Harry was great with her, could settle her when she was upset, make her laugh. 

We babysat her one night, while his mum and aunt went out for a drink. I realised then what a great dad Harry would be one day, I didn’t think it would be so soon though. He had so much he still wanted to do with his life before settling down, we both did. 

We had spoke about it time and time again, going travelling, working abroad for a summer, coming back and going to university. Before settling down, moving in together, maybe getting married and having kids. 

Looking back on those times, they all seem so long ago now. We had been so naive and foolish to think that we would last forever. But it didn’t feel silly at the time, it felt right. We were so in love. Where did we go wrong?

“Makayla Payne”

I stood slowly as my name was called, wiped the tear that had fell from my eye before I could stop it. I took a deep breath before walking slowly towards the doctor’s office, feeling my mum’s presence behind me.

 

* * * *

 

That was it. 

It was confirmed. I was pregnant. The doctor had checked for me and told me that yes, I was pregnant. No mistake, no false positive test. There was a small human being growing inside me and it was mine. My baby. 

After seeing the doctor I had been sent along to the expectant mothers unit, they had told me that I was around 10 weeks pregnant, although they couldn’t be exact about how far along I was just yet. I was booked in for a scan in two weeks time, they would have a better idea then. 

I sat in the front seat of my mum’s car, my hand pressed against my stomach. I couldn’t help but feel happy. I knew I probably shouldn’t, I was seventeen and about to become a single mother. But this was my baby, I already felt protective of it, I already felt like its mum. I smiled down at my belly, trying to imagine myself with a bump.

My mum dropped me off at school and I made my way into the common room. The bell would be ringing for break in 5 minutes, so no point in me going to class.  
I still felt cheery as I opened the door into the common room, but that soon dissipated as I noticed the only other person in the room. 

Harry.

I could have just ignored him, sat somewhere else. He wouldn’t have noticed, what with his back being to the door.

We were on our own though, this was probably the best - maybe even the only - chance I had at telling him. I stood on the spot for a second, trying to decide whether to tell him or not. Before shaking my head, this was Harry, I could always talk to him about anything. Even before we had started going out, we had been best friends. I could do this. 

“Hey” I said quietly, making my way over to him. His head snapped up, immediately recognising my voice. He smiled softly at me, although he seemed rather surprised I was talking to him. I pointed at the seat next to him, “Can I sit?”

“Of course.” His smile grew larger then, “You don’t have to ask. How are you Kay?”

I shrugged, “Ok, I guess”

He hung his head. “I’m so sorry. That thing with Taylor, it shouldn’t have happened. It’s just, I don’t know, we’d been arguing a lot and I hardly seen you, what with studying and your play – you done amazing by the way, best sandy ever. Although I wish Louis hadn’t been Danny. It’s kind of hard to watch one of your best friends kissing the girl you love, especially when said girl hates your guts.”

I smiled sadly at him. “I don’t hate you Harry. Believe me, I wanted to at times, but I just couldn’t.” 

“Well I’m glad.” He nudged me with his shoulder. “Hey, what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be in history?”  
I smirked, he still remembered my timetable. 

“Yea, I had the doctors.”

“Oh!” he frowned, “You’re ok, aren’t you?”

“I’m fine.” My stomach fluttered, he still cared about me “about that though. That’s really why I came over here. I need to tell you something.”

“What is it?”

“Well...see... the thing is” there I go with the stuttering again. Why can’t I just say it? I said it fine to the doctor. Surely I can do the same with Harry. “I’m... well... I’m...”

“Well, well, well” I jumped, turning round at the voice behind me. Only to find Louis Tomlinson, Harry’s best friend stood directly behind us with a smirk on his face. “What do we have here then?”

“Nothing” I shot him my best puzzled face “We’re just talking, that is allowed isn’t it?”

“Course it is” Louis didn’t sound entirely convinced. “If you do decide to hook up again though make sure and get a room. I really don’t need to be seeing you two doing the nasty. I still have nightmares from that time I walked in on you at Zayn’s birthday party.” He shuddered for affect. 

I rolled my eyes as I stood up. There goes my chance to tell Harry then.

“Bye Louis !” I turned to Harry “Bye.”

I began to walk away towards the foyer to find the girls, as the common room filled with 5th and 6th years. 

“Wait, Kayla, you were going to tell me something” Harry called, just as Louis shouted.

“Remember and use a condom!”

Bit late for that.


	3. Chapter 3

After Monday the entire week flew past, until Thursday. Everything was going on as normal and I didn’t know how no-one seemed to realise the turmoil that was going on inside my head. I was sure someone would realize something was wrong soon and I kept becoming paranoid that soon someone would realise that I was pregnant.

Perrie, who admittedly was only trying to be helpful, was doing nothing to help my paranoia and instead making it a whole lot worse.

“Here let me take that” Perrie stated. It was Thursday morning, break had just ended and I had taken my – admittedly large – maths textbook out of my locker. “You shouldn’t be carrying anything heavy, in your condition”

“Perrie will you be quiet” I hissed, my eyes widening in disbelief. “For one thing – it’s a textbook, it’s not heavy. Also, I’m hardly about to drop, I think I can go a few more months before I need to worry about what I can and cannot carry and will you shut up about my ‘condition’ ” – I used my fingers to put air quotes round the word condition – “I do not need anyone figuring out I’m pregnant, do I?”

“Kayla, calm down and stop being so paranoid” Perrie laughed, lightly “No-one is going to figure out you’re pregnant just because I carried your textbook.”

“Still” I snapped slightly, before noticing my tone and lightening it considerably “I don’t need you mollycoddling me, I’m fine” I smiled to let her know I wasn’t annoyed at her and that I appreciated that she meant well.

With the conversation now closed we turned and began making our way towards class, when my phone went off signalling that I had a text:

_Mum: Meet me outside your school at the beginning of your lunch today. I’ve got you an appointment. Don’t worry about class, I’ve phoned the school and explained you won’t be in this afternoon._

Well, that was strange. I quickly text my mum back asking what the appointment was for before turning my phone off and heading into class. I had no clue what the appointment was about.

By the time it came to lunch, my mum hadn’t replied to my text and it was beginning to strike me as a little odd. I had a feeling that something bad was about to happen.

 

*                           *                           *                           *                

I stood waiting at the front door, looking out for my mum’s car.

“Hey you, what you doing out here by yourself?”

“Just waiting for my mum, apparently I’ve got an appointment this afternoon. Don’t ask me what it’s for though, I have no idea.” Harry laughed as I pulled a confused face. “What about you?”

“I have a Thursday afternoon off, remember?” he looked hurt that I forgot “Just about to head home.”

“Oh yea” I chuckled “How could I forget. All those Thursdays at lunch, you used to try and convince me to ditch and come home with you.”

“And if I remember correctly you did on many occasions” he placed his hands on my hips. My breath caught as I felt his breath hit my lips as he moved closer to me.

I swallowed, before whispering, “Yea well you’re a bad influence Harry Styles.”

He didn’t reply. Instead he moved closer still, until his lips where ghosting over mine, barely touching.

_BEEP!_

We jumped apart at the sound of a car horn. I narrowly avoided whacking my head off the wall behind me as I looked over Harry’s shoulder to see my mum staring at us.

I cleared my throat. “I... uh... I better go” I said walking around Harry, although still facing him and pointing over my shoulder in the general direction of my mum’s car. “Bye.”

“Yea, bye” Harry seemed to be dazed, and he shook his head like a dog, as if to clear his head. He waved lightly to me before turning and walking towards the school gates.

My mum beeped the horn at me again, making me jump once more. I realised then I had stood and watched Harry for a minute too long. I turned and made my way to the car, a small smile on my face as I hoped into the front seat.

“What?” I asked, acting totally oblivious. As if my mother hadn’t just caught me an inch away from kissing my ex-boyfriend/baby-daddy and then proceeded to ogle him as he walked away from me.

_What can I say, it’s not my fault he has a nice bum._

“Don’t what me.” My mum replied, her voice rising slightly. I winced, clearly she wasn’t happy with this turn of events. “You know exactly what. He cheated on you Kayla. I thought you would have a bit more self respect than to run after him.”

“Yes mum, I know he cheated, but thanks for reminding me.” I rolled my eyes at her. “I didn’t run after him either, he came over to me, he came onto me. I was just stood there waiting for you and then his hands were on my hips and he was moving closer towards me and we were winding each other up and it just felt like old times and I don’t know. I can’t just turn my feelings off, can I? Besides he’s the father of my unborn child.”

“Speaking of that, have you told him yet?”

“No” I deflated slightly, remembering I still had to tell him.

“Yes, well do you think he’ll still be trying to get you back once he finds out? He’ll be running in the other direction, you mark my words.”

“Harry’s not like that mum.” My mum scoffed. “He’s not! For everything else he’s done wrong, he’s not the type of guy to just leave me with the baby. He’ll do what’s right.”

“Kayla, he’s a 17 year old boy, there all like that. Trust me.”

“You’re wrong.”

 

With that I fell silent turning to face out the window, content to remain in a mood with my mum for the rest of the day. She doesn’t know what she’s talking about, she doesn’t know Harry like I do.

“Where are we going anyway?” I asked, after about 20 minutes, realising I still had no clue what this appointment was for. We were in a part of town I had never been before. I didn’t recognise the area at all.

“Hmm?” my mum turned, having not heard me. She seemed deep in thought, worried even.

I was beginning to feel uneasy.

“The appointment, where is it?” I asked again.

“Oh, we’re not far now, just around the corner.” She smiled at me but it didn’t reach her eyes. Something wasn’t right.

“What’s the appointment for mum?” I frowned at her.

“You’ll see soon enough.” My mum wouldn’t look at me now. She pretended as though she was too busy concentrating on the road. I knew that wasn’t it though. She wasn’t telling me something. She was on edge and jumpy. Her voice had been light and cheery, but I could tell it was fake. It had a slight desperate edge to it.

I was going over our conversation in my head, trying to figure out if she had given me any clues as to what was going on, when she turned into a car park outside a small building.

I tried to read the sign that was hanging over the door but my mum had parked too far from the entrance, I couldn’t make the letters out.

“Where are we?”

“Let’s just get inside, shall we?” There was that fake smile again.

I just nodded, before getting out the car, rain spitting down on me and making my way towards the door. My mum took hold of my hand as we reached about 20 feet from the entrance. That’s when I looked up to see the sign above the door.

**SANDYFORD ABORTION CLINIC**

I recoiled as if someone had slapped me, feeling my body fall in on itself as I let my hands fall over my stomach, as if attempting to shield my baby from what was happening.

“NO! MUM NO!” I was out of control by this point. I was sobbing uncontrollably, edging backwards away from the clinic.

“Kayla, calm down. Let’s talk about this, you’re being unreasonable.”

“No, mum please.” I was kneeling on the ground now, pretty much begging my mother, as the rain started pouring down on us. “Please don’t make me do this”

“Kayla, we both know you’re too young to be a parent. I’m doing what’s best for you. You’ll thank me for it one day. I promise.”

With that she pulled me up by the arm, keeping a firm grip on me and marched me into the clinic.

I gave up fighting as we made our way into the building, the fight slowly dying in me as my entire body and brain just seemed to go numb.

This can’t be happening.

My mum ordered me to go sit in one of the chairs in the reception as she gave my name to the woman behind the desk, before coming to sit next to me.

Mum kept talking to me, going on about how brave I was, how deep down I knew this was the right thing to do. But I blocked her out I wouldn’t listen to her. In this moment I hated her. She said I would thank her for it one day. I highly doubted it.

My brain felt foggy and clouded as I sat there, tears streaming down my face, hand protectively cradling my stomach.

This can’t be happening.

Soon my name was being called by a nurse down the corridor. I barely heard her, it was as if she was 10 miles away from me instead of 10 feet. I watched as my mum got up, before rising to my own feet. I turned, taking one last look at the exit before turning and walking into the room that the nurse had just walked back into.

This can’t be happening.

I sat on one of the plush comfy chair in the corner of the room, there was no desk instead a coffee table. I expect it was meant to make the room feel more homely, make the patient – make me- feel more at ease. It didn’t work.

I continued to stare off into space while the woman spoke, unable to focus on anything she said. I was broken out of my reverie when I heard my name.

“Makayla, are you ok? I know this is a lot to take in. I appreciate it’s really difficult. Are you sure this is what you want? I can give you a minute if you like.”

“No, that’s quite alright” My mum cut her off, “We know this is what is right for Makayla.  Don’t we honey?”

This can’t be happening.

“No” my voice came out croaked and broken. I cleared my throat, trying to find my voice. “No, this isn’t what I want. I don’t want to lose my baby. Please mum I can’t do this.”

With that the numbness broke, I was back to the mess I had been outside the car park. Only now I was becoming defiant. I wasn’t going to sit here and let my mother make me kill my own child, her grandchild.

“This is my baby! I’ll decide what happens. I will not kill my own child. I could never live with the guilt if I did.” With that I got up and stormed out of the room and out of the building, back out into the pouring rain.

I made my way over to the car, pulling at the handle but the door stayed locked.

“Open the door” I screeched at my mother. “I want to go h..home”

“No Makayla, you stupid girl. You’re going to go in there and get this procedure done and then we’ll go home and this will all be over with.”

“Procedure? You say that like I’m getting my nails done. You’re trying to make me kill my baby, your grandchild.”

“No! That is not my grandchild. Nor is it your baby. Can’t you see that by keeping that thing” she pointed harshly at my stomach “You are ruining your life. I am your mother and I’m doing what’s right for you.”

“Yea well I’m a mother now too, whether this baby is born yet or not, I am still its mother and I will do what is right for it.”

“Oh stop being all high and mighty. You don’t know the first thing about being a mother.”

“NEITHER DO YOU!” I screamed, causing the couple walking past on the pavement to turn and stare at us. “If you did, you would never try and make me do this. I can’t hurt my baby.”

“You aren’t hurting it, it isn’t alive.”

“I can feel it mum. I know it doesn’t make sense. It’s not big enough to kick yet or prod, but I know it’s there and I can’t just get rid of it. Act like it never happened. Because it did and if I go through with this abortion, I’ll always remember that feeling, knowing it was inside me and that I just extinguished its life before it even had a chance of living. I can’t do it.”

“Oh you can and you will” with that my mum grabbed me by the arm, tight enough that I could feel a bruise forming and once again marched me back into the clinic.

This time though I didn’t come quietly. I screamed at her to let me go, begged her once again not to do this, dug my heels into the ground and refused to move.

“Makayla, you’re acting like a child. Stop it you’re making a scene.” My mum snarled at me through gritted teeth as we made it to the reception desk. She turned to the woman behind the desk. “Sorry about that. Makayla’s ready to have the procedure now.”

“If you hold on one second I’ll just get the nurse you were dealing with to come have a word with you.” With that she picked up the phone and began having a short conversation with the nurse I assume I had seen in the room before.

Sure enough, two minutes later, said nurse walked into the reception.

“Hello again Mrs Payne” My mum smiled at her, as the nurse – her name badge said her name was, Caroline – turned to greet me.  “Are you ok Makayla?”

I shook my head, unable to speak as my body wrecked with sobs.

“If you would like to follow me Makayla.”

My mum made to follow as well but Caroline held her back. “If you don’t mind Mrs Payne, I would like to talk to Makayla privately.”

My mum looked as if she wanted to argue back but finally nodded to Caroline before giving me a pointed look and sat back down in the reception area.

 

*                      *                           *                           *

I followed Caroline back into the room we had been in before, sitting down in the same area. Caroline busied herself at the sink, before taking a seat across from me and handing a glass of water.

“Makayla, I want you to think before you answer this question I’m about to ask. Think about all the implications to your life this decision will have on your life, both if you go ahead with this pregnancy or not. Makayla, do you want a termination?”

I sipped on the glass of water, taking deep breathes to calm me down.

I shook my head, “No. I know this is going to be hard for me, I’m not stupid. I know I’ve ruined my life in so many ways but I can’t get rid of it. It’s my baby. It’s living and growing inside of me, I couldn’t live with the guilt.”

“Ok. Well then, that’s that. You’re a smart girl Makayla, I can see the genuine effect all this has had on you. You’re not a silly teenage girl who’s just out to rebel against your parents. I can see clearly that this termination is not what you want. Therefore it won’t happen.”

With that she stood up and made her way over to the door, holding it open for me to walk out ahead of her. I took one last sip of water before heading back into the reception room to see my mum, relief flooding through my veins.

“Is that it done then?” my mum smiled “See, it wasn’t so hard now was it? Give it a couple of months and it’ll all be forgotten about.”

I stared at my mother, unable to recognise the monster that stood in front of me. Did she seriously think I could get rid of this baby and then just forget it ever happened?

“Actually Mrs Payne” Caroline started, explaining so I didn’t have to. I was so thankful that she was there for me. “No, it’s not done. I could tell by Makayla’s actions and words that a termination is not what she wanted, there for, ethically, I couldn’t administer the abortion.”

“What do you mean you couldn’t? I’m her mother and I say I want her to have an abortion!”

“But it’s not your decision to make. _Makayla_ is the baby’s mother and she doesn’t want an abortion. I’m sorry but that is my final answer on the subject. Now if you don’t mind I have other patients, if you could please make your way out.”

I turned and walked out the door, making my way over to the car, waiting for my mum to open it before quickly jumping in.

My mum looked livid as she started the engine up and began the long, silent and extremely awkward drive home.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

“Well, you look shit” Perrie blurted out the minute I sat down next to her in maths Friday morning. “Sorry, that was harsh, it’s just you don’t look good. Do you even have any make-up on?”

“Don’t worry about it. No I don’t. I couldn’t sleep last night and then when I eventually did fall asleep I slept in and ended up with only about 15 minutes to get ready. I’ve not even ate” My tummy growled, proving my point.

“My poor baby, how come you couldn’t sleep? Liam still giving you grief?”

“Yea that and...” I checked over my shoulder, making sure no-one was listening to our conversation before adding in a whisper, “my mother pretty much tried to force me into having an abortion.”

“WHAT!” Perrie yelled, and I quickly put my hand over her mouth.

“Will you keep your voice down.” I hissed, my eyes wide.

“Yea of course, sorry” Perrie continued sheepishly “It’s just, you didn’t did you?”

I shook my head looking down at my desk, quickly wiping the tear away that had spilled out.

“I couldn’t” I whispered “Maybe it would have been the sensible thing to do but I just couldn’t”

Perrie nodded. “How did your parents take it?”

“Awful. You should have seen them Perrie. When I got home I had went straight to my room, I didn’t want to talk to them. I sat on the stairs at one point though, listened to them while they spoke in the kitchen. You should have heard them, they were so mean. I don’t think they’ll ever come round. They hate me.”

“Don’t be silly” Perrie cut me off, grabbing me into a hug when she seen the tears threatening to spill over. “They could never hate you, they’re just angry. Give it time.”

I nodded, wiping my eyes.

“Makayla, are you ok?” My maths teacher was looking to me in concern.

“Yea, I’m ok” I nodded. “It’s just, stuff at home. Family issues. Can I just go get some fresh air for a minute?”

“Ok, but don’t be long.”

I smiled at my teacher, to show my appreciation for being let out of class.

 

*                           *                           *                           *

 For the second day in a row I found myself stood against the wall outside the front door. It didn’t seem to be the only thing repeating itself.

“We’ve got to stop meeting like this?” I jumped when I heard his voice, turning to watch as he strolled towards me, back pack in hand. Clearly, Harry was running late.

“You’re late.” I scolded him, lightly.

“Yea well, won’t be the first time. Doubt it’ll matter if I add on a few more minutes.” He reached me, his face slowly turning to a frown. “Are you ok? You don’t look so good.”

“Gee thanks. I slept in, didn’t have time to do my make up or my hair properly. Good to know I’m ugly without it.”

“I didn’t say that and it’s not because you have no make-up on. I’ve seen you without it plenty of times, you don’t normally look so pale though. Or have bags under your eyes. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing” I lied. What was the matter with me? He was being so nice to me and yet I still couldn’t tell him. Seriously, two little words and he’ll know. It’ll be done, I won’t have this guilt constantly building within me every time I see him. I couldn’t though. “I’ve not been talking to Liam that’s all.”

“How come?” he frowned, “You two are really close.”

I shrugged. “It doesn’t matter.”

He placed one hand on my hip and I was reminded of yesterday, “I’m not exactly his favourite person these days either.” He smiled sadly.

“Yea well you deserve it” I rolled my eyes.

“I know.” His free hand came up to land in my hair, cupping the back of my head. “I really am sorry about all that you know?”

I nodded, before feeling the familiar sensation of his lips against mine. I gripped hold of his shirt, pulling him in, letting myself get lost in the kiss for a minute before coming to my senses, pushing him away.

“I should get back to class, the teacher will be wondering where I am” I stuttered, walking backwards towards the door and trying to catch my breath. “And you’re late enough as it is.”

I turned and ran back to class before my will power gave way and I ended up doing something I’d regret.

I sat down, noticing Perrie smirking at me.

“What?”

“Oh nothing,” Perrie sing-songed, “Someone’s got a bit of colour to their cheeks all of a sudden”

“Yea well, fresh air does that to you, doesn’t it?”

“Course it does” – why must she be so sarcastic? – “How come your lips are swollen?”

“Huh, oh, must have been biting them. I do that when I worry.”

“Oh ok.” She nodded once, although I could tell she didn’t believe me.

“Perrie?” I asked, wanting to move the subject on “Can I stay at yours this weekend? I don’t really feel like seeing my parents, or Liam, anytime soon.”

“Of course.” Perrie’s entire expression changed to one of concern. “You can stay as long as you want.”

“Thanks” I smiled, before turning back to my work.

“No problem honey” she returned the smile, as she too changed her focused on her work.

...

“Makayla?” Perrie questioned five minutes later, her eyes not leaving the current math problem she was trying to solve. “You do realise the front doors can be seen from here don’t you?”She gestured to the window, directly beside her with a jerk of her head.

“Uh... no, I hadn’t actually”

          *                           *                           *                           *

 

Ever walked into a room to realise you were being talked about? To walk through a door and conversation just stops? Yes, well that’s what happened to me on Sunday night when I had walked into the house to find my family congregated in the kitchen.  My mother appeared to be making fajitas’ for dinner, the thought made my stomach churn, I didn’t like them at the best of time let alone now – when I was lucky if I could keep a plate of soup down.

 “Oh look who’s finally decided to grace us with her presence.” My dad’s sarcasm wasn’t lost on me.

 “Yes well,” I turned to him, rage starting to boil up. “I had to didn’t I? I have school tomorrow. Otherwise believe me, I wouldn’t have come back. I don’t want anything to do with a family who would try and force me to abort their own flesh and blood.”

 “What?” Liam looked between dad and myself, confused. Looks like he wasn’t aware of mum and dad’s little plan.

 “Oh give it a rest Kayla,” my dad rolled his eyes “we were only trying to do what was best for you. Pity you didn’t listen.”

 I scoffed, before turning to head up the stairs.

“Yes well, if that’s all, I’m going to head to bed. I can’t be in the same room as you lot any longer, it makes my skin crawl” I sneered round at both my parents and sent Liam a hateful glare for good measure. He still wasn’t in my good books.

 “Actually that’s not all” my mum snapped at me, walking over to place a plate in front of my dad and pulling out another seat. “So I guess your skin will just have to crawl for a bit longer. Now, sit down.”

 I remained standing, arms crossed over my chest and glaring at my mum.

 “SIT DOWN KAYLA” I jumped, my mum rarely raised her voice, although it was becoming more regular these days. I sat down slowly in a chair across from my dad, picking at my finger nails and refusing to look at anyone.

 My mum sat with her own plate placed in front of her and addressed me before eating. “Now as you know, tomorrow is Liam’s first day back at school.”

 I nodded, glancing at Liam, to find him thoroughly engrossed with his dinner, he must know what was coming and know that whatever it is, I wouldn’t like it.

 “Yes well, Liam meeting with your head of year, Mr Cardle, first thing. We want you to go with him and tell Mr Cardle exactly why Liam punched Harry.” I went to interrupt but my mum cut me off. “We’re hoping that Mr Cardle with be more lenient with Liam once he finds out the exact reason everything happened. This way maybe he’ll be less likely to put the suspension on Liam’s permanent record.”

 I nodded, tears welling up. “I guess that’s fair” I whispered. “I don’t want Liam’s future to be ruined because no university will accept him for this. I’ll tell Mr Cardle.”

 My parents and Liam seemed shocked by my willingness to do as they were asking; they clearly expected more of a fight.

 “Well, they’re going to find out sooner or later, aren’t they?” I explained, looking to each family member in turn. “May as well get it over with sooner rather than later, there’s things that will need to be worked out obviously.”

 Everyone nodded, remaining quiet although still appearing shocked at my easy co-operation.

 “Now if that’s all this time, I think I’ll just head to my room and try and study for a bit before I go to bed.”

 When nobody objected, I made my way up to my room. And although I had agreed that telling Mr Cardle was the best option, I couldn’t help the feeling of dread building up within me.

 

 *                                     *                           *                           *

 

Monday morning arrived and I found myself walking through the school doors side-by-side with Liam.

 It was ten past nine, meaning the bell had already went and therefore the entrance hall was deserted, everyone already in class. Liam alerted the school secretary of our presence and soon Mr Cardle was walking through a door, leading to the head offices.

 “Liam, it’s good to have you back at school, this shouldn’t take long and then you can head to class. It’s just school policy that you speak to your head of year before returning to classes.”

 He gestured to the door he had just walked through. He was about to head towards the door when he spotted me “Oh Makayla, it won’t be necessary for you to attend this meeting; if you want to head to class that would be great.”

 I opened my mouth to speak but Liam cut me off “Actually can Makayla come to the meeting? There are some issues we would like to discuss and it concerns her so it would be best if she was there.”

 A look of confusion crossed over Mr Cardle’s face but as quick as it appeared it was gone and was replaced with a smile as he merely nodded, before turning and leading the way towards his office. I felt sicker with each step we took although I think it was more due to dread rather than morning sickness at this moment in time.

 “So Liam,” Mr Cardle began, addressing my brother once we were all seated comfortably- or as comfortable as was possible “I have to say that when I heard about the incident between you and Harry I was shocked to say the least. Not only was it extremely out of character but I thought you and Harry were close friends.”

 “Yea well things change” Liam’s tone indicated that he was still angry at Harry, and any chance of them reconciling seemed extremely slim.

 “Yes, I heard the reason you gave for punching Harry, and while I understand that you were acting as a concerned brother” Mr Cardle turned to me at this point “who was merely trying to protect his sister, what you did was extremely unacceptable.”

 “I know” Liam nodded, before looking to the floor and continuing “I had just found out and lashed out. I didn’t even think, I just saw red.”

 “I’m glad to see that you’ve realised you were in the wrong and I hope this means you will agree with me when I say that you will need to issue an apology to Harry Styles before being allowed back into this school, violence will not be condoned.”

 “An apology,” Liam’s head whipped up, a look of disgust evident across his face “am I fuck giving that dickhead an apology”

 “LIAM!” I snapped at him. “Watch your language”

“Well no wonder” Liam roared, getting to his feet “After everything he’s done to you Kayla and they expect me to apologise to him. It’s not happening!”

 “Shouting and swearing isn’t going to help your case” Mr Cardle looked angry now as he snapped at Liam.

 “Liam” I started, my voice small “Apologise to Harry. I know he’s been an idiot but it’s not worth you losing your place at school over. Think of your record, you want to go to University next year don’t you? And besides this situation is as much my fault as it is Harry’s”

Liam shook his head sitting down, facing me.” You’re defending him, after everything that’s happened you’re still defending him?”

 I shrugged. “It’s the truth and we both know it.”

 Mr Cardle looked to me and then Liam, seemingly perplexed by something. “I don’t understand. What’s your fault Kayla? I thought Liam punched Harry because he found out that Harry cheated on you, how is that your fault Kayla?”

 And there it was, time for me to fess up, admit the truth. God, I felt awful. I could feel a rather sizeable lump begin to form in my throat and I had to swallow three times in order to clear it.

 “Well see the thing is,” I started, suddenly finding the colour of the carpet extremely interesting “Liam kind of lied about why he hit Harry.”

 “He lied?” Mr Cardle sounded annoyed again. My head snapped up to see the annoyance evident on his face.

 “Yes, but please don’t be annoyed at Liam” I met Mr Cardle’s eye contact and held it now, my face contorting, the sheer desperation showing clearly as I begged him not to be angry at Liam, it wouldn’t be fair if he was. “I asked him. He did it for me because I didn’t want Harry to know yet, and Harry was there so he said what I asked him to so that he wouldn’t find out.”

 “What didn’t you want Harry to know?” Mr Cardle was looking at me suspiciously now.

 “Umm... well... see...” there was that damn lump again, I swallowed once. My hand falling to lie across my stomach as I took a deep breath, forcing myself to look my teacher in the eye as I once again let those two life changing words slip past my lips “I’m pregnant.”

 Mr Cardle inhaled through his nose, shocked by my revelation. He just nodded so I continued on.

 “Liam found out in English that morning and that’s when he hit Harry. He was just trying to protect me, to look out for me. Please don’t be angry at him. Please?” I felt the tears begin to well up in my eyes. “Please can you not put this whole thing on Liam’s record? He wants to go to University and this will go against him.”

 “I’m sorry Kayla” Cardle shook his head “I have to. Any situation like this has to be put on record.”

 The tears started to fall then and I was unable to stop them. “Please? I’ll do whatever you ask, I already wrecked my own future, and I can’t wreck Liam’s too.”

 My voice broke at the end, as Liam reached over and soothingly rubbed my back. It was the first nice thing he had done for me since we had argued. I still wasn’t ready to forgive him but I wasn’t going to let his life be destroyed because of me.

 Mr Cardle looked conflicted as he watched me wipe at my eyes, urging the tears to stop. “I’ll see what I can do. I can’t promise anything, but we’ll try and avoid putting anything on Liam’s record”

 I nodded my voice shaky as I muttered a “Thank you”.

 "So that’s that issue dealt with I guess,” he went on “but it looks like we now have another one to deal with.” He looked pointedly at me.

 I nodded, shame building within me.

 “So Kayla, how far along are you?”

 “11 weeks”

 “Ok and other than the people in this room, who knows?”

 “Just Perrie Edwards and my parents”

 “Ok, we’ll have to tell your teachers so they can keep an eye on you, make sure you’re safe. There might be a few experiments in your science subject that you won’t be able to do and also in Physical Education you might be best to sit out in the more strenuous sports.”

 “I guess that’s ok, so long as it’s only the teachers who know for now. I’m not ready for everyone to know yet.”

 “That’s fine, this is your decision to make we can’t force you into doing something you aren’t ready to do.”

 “Thank you”

 With everything sorted all that was left was for Mr Cardle to write both of us a note explaining our lateness and we were on our way back to class.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The next two weeks went by quickly without much incident. Things were still strained with my parents and I wasn’t on speaking terms with Liam yet.

I spent most of the time worrying that I’d suddenly started showing and that people at school would figure out. Of course, I still had pretty much a flat stomach with it only beginning to grow slightly; most people would just assume I had put on a bit of weight. I could live with that.

One thing that had changed though, was that my teachers now knew of my current state. I, thankfully, didn’t need to tell them myself with Mr Cardle doing the honours for me. Something I was hugely grateful for. Most of the teachers were really nice about it: offering me words of advice and sympathetic smiles. That couldn’t be said about all my teachers though. Mrs Sanders, my Biology teacher seemed to think it was her right to take me out of the class half way through the lesson to rant at me about how stupid I was and that I should have known better. She’s old so it wasn’t exactly unexpected for her to have such an opinion, I did thank her for telling me though but pointed it out that it wasn’t actually any of her concern. She left it at that.

 

*                      *                           *                 *

Exactly two weeks after the meeting with Mr Cardle and the girls and I were currently sitting in the gym hall waiting for Physical Education to start, further down the bench I could hear Taylor moaning about something or another. I wasn’t sure what though; I usually try to block her out. I watched as the boys, including Liam and Harry walked outside towards the pitches for football along with Louis. They hadn’t made up yet and I could sense the air around them was awkward from the other side of the hall, Louis seemed oblivious though, either that or he didn’t care. Probably the latter.

Mr Grimshaw, our teacher for the year walked over, carrying a large bag which on further inspection, appeared to hold basketballs.

“Right girls” he began, catching everyone’s attention, “our block of badminton ended last week and we’re now moving on to basketball.”

Basketball? I couldn’t take part in that could I? How was I going to explain my sudden need to sit out?

“You’ll be split up into 4 teams of 6,” Grimshaw continued, “with each team playing each other.”

“But sir,” Taylor began: he voice sickly sweet, indicating she was after something “that’s only 24” – she can do math, who’d have thought – “there’s 25 of us. Someone will need to sit out.”

The light bulb went off in my head.

“Ah yes, so they will” Mr Grimshaw pretended to look round considering who to leave out. We both knew it would be me. “Kayla, could you sit out for me?”

I nodded. “Yea no problem”

As everyone made their way over to the equipment cupboard to grab bibs and sort out the hoops -Taylor grumbling about how I always get special treatment – I smiled over to my teacher and mouthed a ‘thank you’ to him. He just shrugged as if to say, ‘don’t mention it’.

I spent most of the lesson sat on the bench, my arms curled protectively round my abdomen – heaven forbid a stray ball hit against me – watching the other girls play. I was really bored if I was honest. As a sporty girl I loved P.E and didn’t enjoy having to sit out, despite what Taylor might think but I guess it wasn’t really an option for me to continue playing.

Three quarters of the way through the class, Mr Grimshaw came over to sit next to me.

“So how’ve you been?” He started, smiling over at me. As one of the younger teachers in the school he was also one of the less judgemental and one you were able to talk to and have a joke with.

“Oh you know, pregnant” I said quietly, making sure no-one could hear me. He raised his eyebrows at me in a ‘that’s-not-what-I-meant-and-you-know-it’ sort of way. I continued: “Honestly? I’m ok I guess. Still getting used to the idea of you know, being a mum? But the morning sickness isn’t as bad anymore which is a bonus. I just keep asking myself if I’m doing the right thing”

“You are” the sincerity in his eyes was startling to say the least. He was the first person to tell me that what I was doing was right and that I actually believed “I hope I’m not speaking out of turn but you’re honestly doing the right thing. My sister, she had a baby at your age, little Charlie. Trust me the wee guys a handful and yea, Sarah found it hard at times. But she loves that boy so much and if she could go back and change how things happened, I know she wouldn’t even consider it for a second. Charlie’s 5 now and he’s still a cheeky wee thing at times but he’ll always be hers.”

“That’s good to hear” I answered, looking to my teacher “But what if I’m not like your sister. What if I’m no good at it? I don’t know the first thing about babies. I just have this overwhelming feeling of dread that I’m going to be a terrible mum.”

Mr Grimshaw looked around; checking no-one was listening into our conversation before replying. “Makayla you’re a smart girl. Yea, you’ll make mistakes but so does everyone. No-one is the perfect parent but you’ll get there. And as for not knowing anything about babies, you have time to learn. The baby isn’t due tomorrow.”

I nodded, feeling comforted for the first time in what felt like forever.

Grimshaw looked at his watch before standing up and blowing his whistle. Instantly, everyone stopped, turning their attention to the teacher.

“Right girls, that’s nearly the end of the period, pack everything back into the cupboard and head back into the changing rooms and get ready for your next class.”

With that the girls started moving again, everyone jumping to action to get the place cleared up quickly so we could go.

Taylor stood at the back of the crowd, trying to get into the cupboard, clutching a basketball and bitching to her group of friends.

“Look at her, she’s not even offering to help put the stuff away,” she sneered towards me as I sat paying no attention to her what-so-ever “probably thinks she’s too good to be doing anything that might break a precious nail. Did you see her flirting with Grimshaw? Does she have no shame? Even if he wasn’t a teacher, she’d have no chance with him. I don’t know what Harry ever saw in her.”

In the next 30 seconds, two things happened at once: Taylor threw the ball in her hand at me, aiming straight for my head, but at that precise moment in time, I chose to stand up, causing the ball to crash straight into my unprotected stomach and the boys walked in from the pitches outside. I fell to the floor as a searing pain shot through my lower abdomen and I was acutely aware of Liam and Perrie kneeling over me, urging me to speak, to inform them that I was ok.

As everyone, both boys and girls, rushed forward to check what all the commotion was about I grabbed Liam’s arm and using it to hoist myself back into a sitting position. I winced as I felt the pain shooting continuously through my stomach as black spots appeared in front of my vision and I began to feel nauseous.

I could hear Mr Grimshaw in the background ordering two of my classmates to go get the school nurse, before another more familiar voice was booming over it, much closer than that of my teachers.

“Kayles” my body tensed; there was only one person who ever called me that. I looked over at Harry, his face contorted in worry, “Are you ok? What happened?”

“Of course she’s ok” Taylor scoffed at me, rolling her eyes “It’s just typical Kayla, always having to be centre of attention. Like seriously, will you just get over yourself?”

“You stupid, idiotic, self-centred little bitch!” all eyes were on Perrie as she moved to within an inch of Taylor’s face, her own face and neck going red with rage as she ranted at her “she does not always have to be centre of attention, I think you have her confused with you and for your information she is NOT ok. Thanks to you. I mean she’s...”

“Perrie” Liam snapped lightly at her aware of what was about to come tumbling out of Perrie’s mouth. It was no use.

“...pregnant! I swear to god if anything happens to her or the baby I will personally rip every blonde hair out of that stupid bimbo head of yours!”

...

You could have heard a pin drop as Perrie finished shouting. Her eyes went wide as she realised what she said and she quickly raised her hands to her mouth, as if trying to shove the words back into her mouth, like that would stop everyone from realising what she just said.

“You’re pregnant?” This question was asked simultaneously by two different people. The first being Taylor, I knew this as I watched the words leave her mouth. She seemed positively ecstatic with the news, not even bothered to be worried about Perrie’s threats. Clearly, she was thrilled with this revelation, in a vindictive sort of way.

The second voice sounded more worried to say the least and I can’t seem to blame him. I screwed my eyes shut before turning towards him, scared to see the look on his face. I eventually managed to prise my eyes open slowly, one at a time, to see Harry – and the rest of my P.E class- staring back at me. His face was deathly pale as he looked at me, his eyes wide and his jaw almost at the floor.

I nodded slowly. “I’m sorry,” my voice small as tears started to run silently down my cheeks, why can’t I stop crying? “I kept trying to tell you but I... I just couldn’t do it.”

He didn’t seem to be computing anything I said but started nodding slowly before turning and bolting his way past everyone and out the hall.

I turned my face into Liam’s shoulder, letting the tears wrack through my body as the school nurse finally made her way over to me.

Mr Grimshaw finally shouted for everyone to hurry up and go get changed before they were late for class. He told Liam and Perrie to go to but I clung tightly to Liam not letting him go. Argument or not, I needed my big brother now. 

He stayed with me as the nurse examined me and decided that I would need to go to hospital to be on the safe side. As she rushed ahead to phone an ambulance and my mother, Liam attempted to help me stand. Soon though it became apparent that the pain was too much for me to be able to walk, as I bent over double once more.

I let out a frustrated sigh, before suddenly finding myself raising 3 feet off the ground as Liam held me to him and carried me towards the office to wait for the ambulance.

“Whatever would I do without you?” I smiled at Liam, choosing to ignore the whispers following me, as we made our way through the student body.

*                      *                           *                           *

“I think both you and baby will be fine Miss Payne.” The doctor smiled at me as he inserted the needle into my arm – I squirmed, always hating getting my blood took. “I’ll send away for blood tests to be on the safe side but based on my examinations I don’t see anything wrong. Better to be safe than sorry though.”

I nodded, a single tear managing to fall. “I hope you’re right.”

“Not to be big headed but I always am.” He winked before placing everything on a small movable table and exiting the room.

Not thirty seconds later and Liam was entering the room. I couldn’t help but notice the way he stood fidgeting and scratching the back of his head. He must be nervous for some reason.

“Hey,” he said quietly as if a loud noise might startle me. He began to swing his arms “So...I phoned mum. Turns out the school had already got in touch with her, she’s on her way.”

I nodded. “That’s good.” I felt the nervous energy within the room and the awkwardness began to build. I knew it was due to the arguments of the last two weeks; this is the longest we had been in the same room as each other since this entire thing began. I smiled up at Liam and I seen his body physically relax, as he released a breath I don’t think he was aware he was holding. He smiled back at me and took a seat beside me, content now it was obvious that I wasn’t going to start shouting at him again.

“Kayla, I’m so sorry. I’ve been such a terrible big brother to you and –“

“No you’ve not” I interrupted.

“I have,” he insisted, his eyes almost bulging out his head as though pleading with me to agree with him. “But I promise I’ll make it up to you. I’ll never hurt you like that again. I’m you’re big brother and I should be supporting you not hurting you. A time like this is when you needed me most and I haven’t been there for you. I’m so sorry.”

He began to cry in earnest then, the tears falling thick and fast down his face.

I shushed him lightly, pulling his face in under my arm and stroking his hair in comfort. “Liam, don’t worry about it. You were angry, I can understand. And you’re here now. This is when I needed you most and you’re here.”

Liam looked up at me then and nodded, wiping the tears from his face. I smiled lightly at him as the door opened abruptly and my mother came running into the room.

“Kayla are you ok?” she urged, practically shoving Liam out of the way to be by my side.

“I’m fine mum” I rolled my eyes. “The doctors took some test to be safe but he said based on the examinations he did, I should be ok.”

“And the baby?” I was startled then at the tone in my mother’s voice. Up until now she had shown no desire to even acknowledge its existence and yet by her tone she sounded genuinely worried.

“Yea, he says the baby will be fine too” I smiled up at my mum.

“Oh thank god!” With that she collapsed onto the nearest chair. “No need to look so shocked” she continued as Liam and I both stared, mouths gaping at her. “That’s my grandchild in there” she pointed at my belly.

It was as if a weight had been lifted from my shoulders, as it appeared that my mum was finally coming to accept everything that was happening.

The three of us lapsed into silence as I sat feeling content with my life for the first time in what felt like forever. It’s weird- although a little sad – that it took me being rushed to hospital for everything to be headed back towards at least some kind of normality but I was hardly going to complain that we’d finally got there.

Half an hour later and the doctor was back.

“So, I’ve managed to have your blood work fast tracked and tested and as I said everything appears fine.” The doctor smiled at me. “Both you and baby are fit and healthy. However, that doesn’t mean a bump like this won’t have its repercussions. I urge you to be careful throughout the pregnancy as this incident may have caused the umbilical cord’s strength to weaken and a further issue could cause it to break.”

I nodded.

“Don’t worry doc, I’ll make sure she doesn’t come into harm’s way.”

“Mum, I’m 17 years old and about to become a mum. I think I’ll be able to look after myself.”

“Yes well, as your mum it’s my job to make sure you’re ok, no matter how old you are. A fact you’ll learn soon enough”

My mum smiled at me and I couldn’t help but smile back as she referenced my impending motherhood.

“I’m glad to hear Kayla has people around her to look after her, she’ll need all the help and support she can get” The doctor stated. “I don’t see any reason to keep you in any longer Kayla, you’ll be fine. The pain may still be there for a short while but I suggest you have a nice long bath and that should help keep it subdued.”

I smiled and thanked him for all his help before turning and making my way out of the hospital arm and arm with Liam and mum.

 

*                      *                           *                           *

I walked into the house and was quickly engulfed in the arms of my dad.

“Are you ok pal?” he started speaking quickly, something he only does if he’s worried. “I was so worried” – knew it – “is everything ok? The baby is ok isn’t it?”

“Yea, I’m ok and so is the baby” I smiled as my father finally realised me from his grip.

“Good. Can’t have anything happening to my grandson now can we”

“Grandson?” I questioned. “Since when have we known it’s a boy?”

“It’s a boy, I just have a feeling”

“Yea, well you had feeling that I was having two girls and look how that turned out” My mum snorted.

“Yea well, I’m still not sure that we didn’t get two girls” My dad replied.

“I heard that” Liam called from the kitchen, making us all start laughing. It felt good to finally be able to have a laugh and a joke with my family again.

“Well, I think I’ll go run a nice hot bath and have a good old soak for a while and then I’ll head to bed for an early night.” I explained to everyone.

“Ok honey, shout if you need anything” my dad kissed my forehead.

 

*                      *                           *                           *

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?! YOU’VE GOT SOME NERVE SHOWING UP AT THIS DOOR”

I woke with a jolt hearing my father’s raised voice echo up the stairs. I took in my surroundings around me noticing it was dark and checking the time on my phone, it was half past 9 – I must have crashed out fairly quickly after my bath. I also spotted I had about 7 missed calls and 10 unread text messages on my phone from Harry.

It was then that I heard the second voice.

“Please? I just want to check that Kayla is ok. I’ve tried texting her and phoning but she’s not answering. Please I need to see her.”

I stood up, making my way slowly down the stairs. I was at the bottom of the stairs when I realised all I had on was an overgrown white top and a pair of shorts. I guess it didn’t really matter. It wasn’t like Harry hadn’t seen me in less.

“Well maybe she doesn’t want to talk to you” my dad continued, not yet seeing me. “Have you ever considered that?”

“Dad” I spoke softly, my dad sharply turning to face me. “Please, don’t have a go at Harry. This is no more his fault than it is mine.”

I watched as Harry’s shoulders relaxed, as he realised I wasn’t angry at him.

“It may not be all his fault that I’m about to become a granddad but he is entirely to blame for breaking my baby girls heart and I’m not about to let him walk into my house. Do you hear me?” My dad turned back round, once again roaring at Harry.

“I guess,” Harry looked defeated as he stared at his feet. “It’s just if Kayla really is pregnant” he looked at me and I nodded, realising he needed to be told once last time before he was willing to accept it “then I really need to talk to her. I want to sort this, it’s my baby too. Surely as a dad you realise how important it is that we don’t mess this up. I know I fucked everything up and believe me I regret it so much, but I want to do the right thing.”

My dad began to waver and he soon stepped back allowing Harry inside the door, unfortunately at that moment Liam decided to walk down the stairs.

“What are you doing here?” Liam snapped, his voice instantly cold.

“I need to talk to Kayla.” Harry stated, clearly trying to placate Liam

“I don’t think so. She wants nothing to do with you. Tell him Kayla”

I opened my mouth to answer but Liam cut me off not giving me time to reply.

“No use coming round now acting all concerned” Liam’s voice began to raise “Where were you today? When Kayla was in agony and you’re baby might have been harmed? Oh that’s right you turned and fled didn’t you. You didn’t care at all!”

“That’s not fair” Harry was beginning to get angry now, I could tell. “I had literally only found out right then and there. How do you think that made me feel? I had to get my head around it didn’t I? I had all these questions in my head and I just needed time to think”

“I don’t care.” Liam roared, grabbing Harry by the scruff of the neck and beginning to push him out the door.

“Liam stop it!” I screamed, rushing after them, only stopping at the door, my lack of clothing stopping me from following them out onto the street where it had turned into a scuffle. Harry was trying to get out of Liam’s grip and make his way back into the house but my brother wasn’t having any of it.

“Kayla, needed you and like always you weren’t there.” My brother continued, holding Harry tightly by the arms from behind and speaking to quietly for me to hear from my spot at the door. “I don’t know how I ever could have been friends with you. You’re nothing but a scumbag who doesn’t care about anything but getting into girls pants. Did you even love Kayla at all?”

“Of course I did” Harry snapped his face whipping round to look at Liam. “I know I’ve been a dick but I want to put it right.”

Liam threw Harry from him and he went sprawling to the pavement below. I heard him wince in pain and gasped as Liam threw a punch at him.

“Liam stop!” I screamed once more, quickly rushing out, my bear feet slapping against the pavement. I got to my brother’s side just in time to see him land a kick to Harry’s ribs. “That’s enough”

I pulled Liam back and inside the gate as Harry slowly got to his feet, wiping the blood from his lip and clutching at his side.

“I uh, think maybe you should just go for tonight” I whispered softly “I’ll talk to you tomorrow ok.” I tried to smile at him, showing him that I wasn’t annoyed at him.

He just nodded before turning and walking away from the house.

I made my way back into the house after Liam and slammed the door behind me.

“What?” Liam asked me, incredulously.

“Don’t you EVER do something like that again?” I shouted at him. Just when I thought things were getting better between us, he had to go and ruin it.

“Kayla, I did that for you?” Liam threw his hands out. “Do you think I wanted that to happen? Harry’s been my best friend since I was 8 years old.”

“You have a funny way of showing it.”

“I can’t help it. The thought of him touching you, it makes me feel – it makes me angry.”

“You can’t honestly say you had no idea we were sleeping together.”

“I guess I hoped you hadn’t and now I know you have I just can’t stand it. I trusted him and he ruined that by taking you to bed and then again when he hurt you. You’re my sister and it’s my job to protect you.”

“I’m a big girl Liam, I don’t need you to protect me” my eyes were cold as I glared at him, the anger not yet out of my system. “And don’t give me the holier than thou, no sex before marriage clap trap either. I’m not an idiot, I’ve known about you and Danielle for ages. At least me and Harry were in a relationship. Not just randomly at hooking up at parties when we’re drunk.”

“Yea well at least I was clever enough to put a cover on it”

I scoffed, shaking my head at him before turning and walking up the stairs while shouting over my shoulder: “I’m not even going to bother arguing with you, it’s pointless.”


End file.
